....sex is a small boat in the ocean of love..........there's more to sex in a relationship.......if it based only or primarily on sex...how are we different than animals or say insects.

If a guy or a gal would base their sexual chenistry to decide on a life partner, it would be the stupidest thing on earth....actually IT IS THE STUPIDEST THING on earth........non-sexual intimacy is the core of many relationships, and thank God for that.

.....my fondest memory is when my girl friend[ now my wife] bought a sweater for me when I was in high school........this is a completely asexual action....and relationships are made of 100s or thousands of such acts and commitments.............Now the question is who will explain this to multigrain? I aint got the time. :-)

Hmm... I don't think we are arguing about the same topic. In fact, I totally agree with what you've written. My fondest memories of past relationships also are the thoughtful things that were done for me.

What I am trying to say in my previous post is that if there are problems with sexual intimacy, it can certainly affect relationship quality... that's how I link the two together. So if a couple's average time for sex is only 3-4 minutes, I would think that one partner is regularly unsatisfied with the encounter, and I'm sure that this would affect relationship quality. It's not only about sexual dissatisfaction, but rather the idea that one partner is too selfish, inconsiderate and self-absorbed with his own needs to care about that of his partner... leaving the other partner feeling unloved. THAT would cause resentment and erode relationship quality. I don't know if I'm missing some piece here, but this is my reasoning.

Are we really in disagreement about this? Is it just a matter of wording, or is there a fundamental conceptual difference?

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Formerly known as "rkaz".

.....great relationships are great not because of sexual intimacy but inspite of it..as I said: Sex is a small boat in the Ocean of Love....

I never said that great relationships are great BECAUSE of sexual intimacy. That wasn't my point at all.

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Formerly known as "rkaz".

3 to 13 minutes, huh?.....thats greeeaaaattt!! I want that guy! It gets done, kick him out of my bed and I still have the rest of the night to get dressed and go to the club with the girls....awsome!


I see nothig wrong with this picture lol!!

FYI if he's 3-13 minutes he probably has a BIG heart that will love you at length to make up for his....you know..problem

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The will of God will never lead you where the grace of God can not protect you!

"The future belongs to those who prepare for it today"
-Malcom X

I always thought sex was a race. I usually win.

Again, its still is what YOU seem to value, not a general consensus, and most certainly not universally true. Good Sex != Quality Relationship, well unless you are the promiscuous type.

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There is no chance, no fate, no destiny that can circumvent, or hinder, or control a firm resolve of a determined soul.

"I've got a degree in Homeopathic Medicine!....You've got a degree in baloney" -Futurama

"...you should take some echinacea, or St. John's Wort...Or a big fat placebo. It's all the same crap" -Futurama

can i watch football during the 13 minutes?