Better than Murder
While working to uncover
a hidden acrostic in the list of bodily organ systems, I strung
out the first letters of the 10 and immediately picked out MURDER,
but had the letters N, I, C, I left over and did not want to
suggest MURDER NICI because NICKI is also the name of my favorite
ex-girlfriend. Then, I wrote out the first three letter of each
and managed to create two phrases which are easy to recall and
make remembering the ten systems a cinch! Ergo:
Sir: I'm nervous about reproducing with the rest. Uri must dig into the end.
The organ system names
buried within the phrases are (in order): circulatory,
immune, nervous, reproduction, respiratory,
urinary, muscle, digestive, integumentary,
and endocrine. Easy now?
Carolus Linnaeus (1707-1778)
named and classified the various forms of life as a way of seeking
order in diversity. He created taxonomy to do this, thus giving
headaches to many generations of students. His system of kingdom
(plant or animal), phylum (backbone?), class (mammal?), order
(carnivore?), family (cat, dog, ape), genus (orangutan or human),
species and variety is still used today, only slightly modified
from the original. One easy sentence used is King Philip Conquers
Our Fifty Grateful States. Two others: King Phillip's Class
Of Family Geniuses Specializes in Variety and Kind Phillip's
Class Orders Family-sized Gino's Special.
Finally, Z.L. offers
this hockey mnemonic: Kings Play Calgary On Friday. Gretzky
Scores! Take your pick.
The 5 kingdoms (used
to be only 2 or 3) are protoctista, plantae, fungi, monera, animalia.
I embedded them into neurons by: Protecting Plants is Fun,
Mon Ami, which sounds like a slogan for a French environmental
Keep Perverts Cleverly
Occupied, For Gosh Sake!!
Science Department, Rappahannock Community College Warsaw, VA)
The 5 sphincters found
in the Alimentary Canal spell APE OIL: Anal, Pyloric,
Lower Esophageal, Oddi, and Ileocecum.
Also, try An Odd Pile Lowers the Ileocecum.
Cars, Piles, and the
Bay of Fundy
is FUN `til the BODY PILES" I remember the
5 layers of the GI stomach: Cardiac, Fundus, Body, and Pylorus.
The fundus looks like the Bay of Fundy (to me, anyway),
and the pylorus is where the food piles waiting for the
sphincter to open.
Some are Ugly
The 4 lobes of the liver
-- quadrate, left & right, caudate -- bring to mind the newspaper
headline of the wheelchair-bound fellow who left a party right
after his ugly girlfriend departed: QUAD LEFT RIGHT after
Dow Jones and the Cannibal
We are supposed to remember
the lengths of the first 3 parts of the digestive system after
the stomach, so I came up with the story of a cannibal who consumes
a dozen people, including an ailing stock market analyst. It
goes: One Ate 12, including an Ill Dow Jones referring
of course to 1, 8, 12-feet lengths for the Ileum, Duodenum, Jejunum.
A really good device
for recalling the bowels is to remember the market news: Dow
Jones Industrial Averages Closing Stock Report whose initial
letters also identify the Duodenum, Jejunum, Ileum, Appendix,
Colon, Sigmoid, and Rectum. It misses the cecum but is otherwise
Quick Peritoneum Facts
The idea is to relate
key letters of related parts. E.g., stomach and omentum (which
lays over the stomach) share the letters OM.
- The bacterium E.
coli is found in Everybody's Colon
- The Omentum
covers the stomach
- The Lesser Omentum
holds the Liver and stomach
- The Mesentery
holds the small intestine
- The mesoCOLON
attaches the large intestine (colon) to the posterior
- The PERITONEUM,
holds PERson's Intestines To Nearest wall.
Oh! Curling turns my
Stomach Inside Out
This is what a housewife
might say in reaction to her husband's sports selection, but
it is a student's way of knowing the 3 layers of muscle around
the stomach. The layers are: Oblique, Circular,
Longitudinal from inside to outside.
People (PPL for short)
have 3 tonsils: Pharyngeal, Palatine, and Lingual.
Bile Breaks fat into Blobs.
Chief stomach enzyme is Pepsin ... remember Geronimo drinking
Pepsi to help his digestion.
Parietal cells Produce Acid, Release
Intrinsic factor, ET AL.
Causes of blood in
Given to me a few years
back when I was in paramedic school, the six causes of blood
in the urine: SHITTT -- Stones, Hematological Disorder,
Infection, Tumor, Tuberculosis, Trauma.
(thanks to Jason Cerovac <firstname.lastname@example.org>)
Charlie Foster and the Hot Blooded Whore
I learned the 8 functions
of blood by the acrostic Old Charlie Foster Hates Women Having
Dull Clothes for Oxygen, Carbon dioxide, Food, Heat, Waste,
Hormones, Disease, and Clotting but I thought it would be easier
to recall if I used the first few letters of each word to make
a new sentence. Thus: Waste Ox Cart Food Disease makes Clot
in Heated Whore. Of course, I related the hormones to "the
Quick Blood / Cardio
- Tricuspid valve is in The Right
Inside part of the heart.
- Mitral is on Left side.
- B Cells Bite virus, T
Cells Torpedo sick cells.
- You need more white
blood cells after an immemorable weekend right? Then remember
Lying Nude in Basement Early Monday has every white blood
cell mentioned: Lymphocytes, Neutrophils, Basophils, Eosinophils,
Centrioles are useful
organelles which play a key role in cell division, namely pulling
the chromosomes apart. Centrioles are ropes made of 9 groups
of 3 fibres, a 9+3 arrangement. How to remember this?
Count the number of letters in "centriole", then count
the syllables. You should get 9 and 3.
Insulin gets sugar Into
cells. Without insulin, a person can die from lack of sugar.
Romans noticed bees attracted to the urine of diabetics and coined
the term "diabetes" to describe the overflow of sugar.
There are actually two forms of diabetes: insipidus and
mellitus, and are not related. D. insipidus is characterized
by excessive and watery urine production and is due to low anti-diuretic
hormone level, often caused by a tumor at the hypothalamus. D.
mellitus is characterized by high volumes of sugary urine caused
by low levels of insulin due to faulty pancreas. Physicians used
to tell the difference between the two types of diabetes by dipping
a finger into the patient's urine and tasting it -- if it was
sweet, he had mellitus.
Tubules & Filaments
Eukaryotic cells are
held together by microtubules, microfilaments, and intermediate
filaments. I find it easy to remember what each does by matching
key letters in each term with their respective duties. For example,
Microfilaments are made of
Actin, Move Food into MICROvilli, are responsible
for Amoebal Movement, Cytoplasmic Streaming,
and Muscular Contraction, and they Move
Fast. Microtubules on the other hand, are made of TUBulin,
Move Slowly, and make the Chromosome fibres.
La Jeune Fils &
A Frenchman gawking
at a young lady dressed in form-fitting jeans might say Des
Tight Gaps and REALLY be thinking about the three types of
cell junctions: Desmosome, Tight, and Gap.
Desmosome junctions, like good blue jeans, will stretch and are
found in the lungs amongst other sites. Tight junctions are useful
for containing liquids and make up much of the GI tract. Gap
junctions allow cytoplasm exchange between cells and help smooth
muscle fibres contract in sequence.
comes from the Greek "to reduce". Meiosis is the process
of reducing the number of chromosomes by half. Without this crucial
step in the formation of gametes, our cells would burst with
DNA. The goal of meiosis is to make egg and sperm cells with
half the number of chromosomes (23 instead of 46) so the egg
and sperm can produce a zygote with 46 chromosomes instead of
92. Meiosis appears to be mitosis happening twice without the
G1, S1, G2 phases, thereby splitting the chromosomes in half
before they replicate. The reduced number of chromosomes is called
the haploid state.
In human sperm and egg
manufacture, meiosis occurs much as mitosis, but instead of entering
interphase after the cell splits, it swings back into prophase
and runs through the process again and ends with two daughter
cells, each holding 23 chromosomes (the haploid state). Ovum
production is slightly different, producing only one ovum, whereas
spermatogenesis makes four sperm cells. The difference occurs
in telophase I, where the ovum shoves 23 chromosomes into a bud
and gets rid of it (women, they hate competition!).
Skin and Tissues
I made up a mnemonic
for the layers of the epidermis that worked for me. I
started on the outside and worked my way in. This one uses the
first 3 letters method: Cora Lucille's Granny Spins Baseballs
are Corneum, Lucidum, Granulosum, Spinosum, Basele. Of course,
you have to know that "Stratum" goes before each of
the words. That part is easy.
Using the 3 first letter
method for cranial bones: Ethel, the Parakeet, is Temporarily
Occupied in Front of the Sphinx. Ethmoid, Parietal, Temporal,
Occipital, Frontal, Sphenoid.
Another 3 first letter
method for the cranial sutures: Saggy Lambs Squash the
Coroner. Sagittal, Lambdoid, Squamous and Coronal.
Keep up the good work
and the great page!
Students reciting College
Lunch is Best or College boys Love Breasts know that
50% of cancers arise in three organs: Colon, Lungs, Breast.
4 Cancer Types
An easy way to relate
four types of cancer to their cells of origin:
- Sarcoma means cancer of the muscle,
and is found in Connective and Muscle tissues. (C, M are letters
- Carcinoma is cancer of epithelial tissue,
and found in stomach and Intestines
- Lymphoma & Leukemia are cancers of blood
Leukocytes and Lymphocytes
Anna has Large Breasts
I recall the mitotic
phases of a cell easily by reciting "I Proposed Marriage
to Anna by Telephone before I Sighted her Cleavage".
That of course indicates the mitotic phases: Interphase, Prophase,
Metaphase, Anaphase, and Telophase, and includes Cytokinesis
(sighted) and cell Cleavage.
Although DNA and RNA
are both nucleic acids, they do different jobs in the cell. Just
remember that DNA Delivers the blueprint, RNA Reads it. Also,
transfer RNA (tRNA) molecule is shaped like the letter T.
Mitosis & Meiosis
Easy way to tell the
difference between the two types of reproduction at the cell
level: mitosis makes Identical Twins,
meiosis makes Egg and Sperm.
Memories of Girls'
If you remember girls
by their limbs, hip & the anus, hip & pussy, and ass,
then you have the four memory centres: limbic, hypothalamus,
hippocampus, association areas. BTW, memories are encoded
at the neural synapses, usually by acetylcholine. The three key
neurotransmitters of the limbic system are dopamine,
norepinephrine, and serotonin ... remembered as
ability to discern feedback from exertion, is located in the
Post-Parietal Sensory cortex. (see how the sounds of proprioception
are in post-parietal sensory?)
Brain is a Mystery
The six parts of the
brain are a mystery -- murder mystery -- with clues hidden all
over, some backwards, some misspelt. We have murder
spelt backwards (cerebrum) and skeletons in the celler (CEREbeLLum
controls skeletal coordination). There's a detective PONdering
M.O. (pons, medulla oblonga), poisoned mulleb wine (in cerebellum),
and someone will die before long (Diencephalon), probably some
dyslexic dim-brain (mid-brain). Furthermore, forensics have discovered
"brain stem" is made up of letters from midBRAIN, pons,
and Medulla oblonga. As well, C+D+E=F because Cerebrum + Diencephalon
In reality, the 6 parts
of the brain are: cerebrum, diencephalon, midbrain, pons, medulla
oblongata, cerebellum. The major groups are forebrain (the most
visible part), the brain stem (three parts piled atop the spinal
cord and within the centre of the brain), and the cerebellum
hanging off the back.
Maybe Cleopatra had
Brain Cells Defended
by ASP means
the six valiant defenders of the cephalon are Blood-brain barrier,
Cerebral spinal fluid, Dura mater, Arachnoid layer, Skull, and
- Groups of nerve cell
bodies are nuclei if they're in the CNS, and ganglia
if in the peripheral nervous system. I remember the nuclei are
in the CNS because they both have the letter C.
- Grey matter is central
to white matter in the spinal cord, because the white stuff is
fat wrapped around and protecting the grey nerves.
- What's the significance
of glial cells? They nourish neurons, keep them from falling
down, and provide tunnels for axons to route. In another perspective:
Albert Einstein's brain had 30% more glial cells than average.
- Four types of glial
cells are ependymal, astrocytes, oligodendrocytes, and microglia.
The mnemonic phrase is Every Asshole Owes Money.
Horny Office Temps
Six factors triggering
smooth muscle contraction are oxygen, temperature, ions, hormones,
stretch, and acid level (pH). The acronym is "SHIP TO"
but the mnemonic phrase is much better: Office Temp's Eye
On Whore Stretching Ass. Notice ion is encoded as
eye on in this example.
The most basic part
of the functional muscle is the cross bridge site where muscular
contractions occur. The process of myosin heads attaching to
actin, bending, then releasing takes four steps: ready, coupling,
bending, letting go. A different chemical triggers each step
thusly: hydrolysis makes Ready; Calcium
ions cause the Coupling; ADP bends the myosin head; ATP
lets go. Sounds like a new dance to me.
Calico Cats' Calm Milk
"Calico Cats' Calm
Milk" is the pathway of smooth muscle contraction: Calcium
Cation attaches to Calmodulin, which binds to Myosin Light
Eye and Vision
- The sclera, choroid
layer, retina and vitreous humor (SCRV) + eyeballs + outer layer
add up to: SCREW your eyes out
- The lens, iris, pupil,
cornea, aqueous humor, and ciliary body can be summed up in Len
and Iris Acquire Puppies in the Corn Silk ... which is an
old-fashioned way of saying they're screwing like dogs in the
- Fovea, the part of the retina most
densely packed with cones, is almost an acronym FOr Very Acute
- The cells of the retina
-- rods, cones, ganglion, polar bodies -- are illustrated by
Rods protected by a Gang of Lions and Polar Bears
- The four outer ear
parts -- pinna, lobe, helix, meatus -- are easily expressed by
a phrase of a lover turning on his girl He licks her helix
like a lover pining for meaning
- Middle ear parts --
tympanic membrane, ossicles, eustachian tube, oval and round
windows -- are best compiled as Tim Observed Eunice's Tube
from two Windows
- Inner ear pieces --
cochlea, sacculus, utriculus, semi-circular canals, 8th cranial
nerve -- are summed up in the phrase 8th Nervember, I dropped
my cock, my sack, and uterus into the semi-circular canal
- Cochlea sections --
vestibular, tympanic & cochlear canals, basilar membrane,
organ of Corti -- might be remembered by thinking of Organ
of Corti plays Bass Notes on CTV channel if you admit that
channel is another word for canal ... CTV (Canadian
Television) are the cochlea, tympanic and vestibular canals,
bass notes is basilar membrane, and the organ is the organ of
Corti of course.
- 8 major hormones from
the pituitary gland spell GOAT-FLAP: gonadotropic, oxytocin,
anti-diuretic, thyroid stimulating, follicle stimulating, leuteinizing,
- The pituitary gland
has two lobes: anterior and posterior. 6 of the preceding hormones
come from the anterior lobe; oxytocin and anti-diuretic are secreted
from the posterior one.
- The adrenal CORTex
produces CORTisol, as well as androgens and aldosterone.
- The adrenal Medulla
secretes stress hormones Epinephrine and Norepinephrine and,
as all women know, men are a source of stress, so it is no surprise
that medulla-epinephrine-norepinephrine make the acronym MEN.
- Adrenal Cortex hormones
start with either of letters A, C -- just like adrenal
cortex. They are: androgen, aldosterone, cortisol.
- Ovaries are RIPE
with hormones: relaxin, inhibin, progesterone, estrogen make
the acronym RIPE.
- Testes make TIM
strong: "t.i.m." is acronym for the 3 hormones secreted
by testes: testosterone, inhibin, and Mullerian-inhibiting hormones.
- Pancreas makes PIGS:
Pancreatic polypeptide, Insulin, Glucagon, and Somatostatin hormones.
- Some secret gasses
represent the 5 hormones of the (where do you think gas comes
from?) gastrointestinal tract: somatostatin, secretin, gastrin,
cholecystokinin, glucose-dependent insulinotropic peptide (GIP).
- Melatonin makes penis
pineal? Melatonin secreted from pineal gland represses
- A Hypocritical Gun-Running
Hero goes to Pit to release Long Hard Fish, but is turned off
the the smell of Estrogen. That was the story of the hypothalamus
secreting GnRH (Gun-running hero) to stimulate the Pituitary
gland into releasing LH and FSH. This process is regulated by
the levels of estrogen.
- Products of the adrenal
cortex, from outer to inner layer: "Salt, sugar, sex;
the deeper you go, the sweeter it gets." (Salt=aldosterone,
sugar=glucocorticoids, sex=sex hormones)
- To remember how osmosis
works, remember that "Particles suck." Thus, tonicity
(hypertonic, hypotonic) refers to concentration of particles,
and water always goes toward the area of more particles. (thanks
to Hallie Ray, Science Department, Rappahannock Community College
I came up with a rhyming
verse that helps me remember how our bodies get warm.When we
feel cold, the hypothalamus reacts by sending TRH to the pituitary
gland, which sends TSH to the thyroid, which secretes T3Tr to
reach the mitochondria, wherein the glycolytic pathway consumes
more energy and consequently the Electron Transport System consumes
more oxygen ... and we get warmer. A more easy way to remember:
O Cold Hippo in the
Thy Sugar Eats
Makes Carbon and Heats
Keywords: Hippo (hypothalamus), Pit
(pituitary), Thy (thyroid), Sugar (glycolytic pathway), Eats
(ETS), Carbon (carbon dioxide).