second thoughts

[prepb18]

upper termers: did any of you have second thoughts before heading down to grenada?

i've always been interested in medicine and felt that it just made sense for me to be a dr. however, now that med school is literally 1 month away, i'm having major doubts. i was literally sitting in the kitchen tonight and started hysterically crying! the idea of studying SO vigorously and giving up quite a lot for the next 7 (at least) years is starting to take a toll.

i enjoy medicine and therefore always thought that med school was the sensible thing to do. however, i've always planned on being a dr and then stopping to raise a family. now i'm doubting whether or not i'm ready to make such a huge commitment. is it silly to go through so much in order to only practice for a limited amount of time? and did any of you have MAJOR doubts before starting med school?

[jaywalk81]

im applying for residency and sometime i still have doubts

[grayeyes043]

upper termers: did any of you have second thoughts before heading down to grenada?

i've always been interested in medicine and felt that it just made sense for me to be a dr. however, now that med school is literally 1 month away, i'm having major doubts. i was literally sitting in the kitchen tonight and started hysterically crying! the idea of studying SO vigorously and giving up quite a lot for the next 7 (at least) years is starting to take a toll.

i enjoy medicine and therefore always thought that med school was the sensible thing to do. however, i've always planned on being a dr and then stopping to raise a family. now i'm doubting whether or not i'm ready to make such a huge commitment. is it silly to go through so much in order to only practice for a limited amount of time? and did any of you have MAJOR doubts before starting med school?

yes, was crying like a baby...seriously i was sobbing...no joke...never lived in a foreign country alone b/f and never really been away from my parents alone for long periods at a time.

[mb2009]

I'm in the EXACT same situation....I had a meltdown in the middle of the night because I was having second thoughts as well...specially when I read through forums and see how tough it is now becoming for IMGs to get residency.
But the way I look at it is, if I give up now, it is something that I'll regret for the rest of my life. I've actually been re-visiting the places where I volunteered to look at the docs in action and its such a reassurance...it reminds me of why I'm doing this and what I want my life to be like ...maybe 10 years from now...nothing in life comes easy so I'm willing to work my butt off for something I know I'll enjoy doing...
hope that helps! and dont worry, you're definitely not alone

[dondon]

i cry before i come down here every term...

[Sassafras]

I think every single one of us has doubts- we just all keep on going and hope that in the end it will be worth it and keep plugging along. Don't think you are the only one. It's a big deal to move here and commit so much to studying- we all question if that's the right thing to do at times. You'll never know though if you don't try, right?

[digitalising]

Once you get down here and actually see what it's like, a lot of the doubts fade. So hang in there.

There are lots of health fairs running through the term so you can reinvigorate that desire to become a doctor. Selectives will also provide you the opportunity to experience first-hand the delivery of medical care (I am thinking of the surgery selective while you are down here, but the Thailand, Prague, and Kenya selectives over the summers also come to mind).

Everyone has doubts, the question is how you manage them. You made the commitment when you applied, now you have to see it through.

[coralis]

I know how you feel.... I`m feeling a little down and depressed, but it`s NOT because medschool and/or commitment for it. I am ready for that... it is for moving continents (AGAIN *sigh* it gets old fast), leaving my mum behind (we have no other family, just me and her and the dog and I'm taking the dog :( ), knowing that I probably will not be able to come back home and will have to make home somewhere else..... leaving a paycheck behind in order to start living in debt.... :( ..... hard.... but I still think it`ll be worth it!

[shadyhtown]

Cry now and you'll be crying much less later

[rokshana]

its not unusal to have doubts, but your statement about becoming a doctor and then stopping to raise a family raises a red flag...why would you do that? and what would you do as a job? be a stay at home mom? and when were you thinking of doing that? I mean even if you are something like 21 fresh out od college, you won't start to practice until you are 28...already into you much of your child bearing years...so say you have kids at 34...or even push it til 40...you will noly have practiced for 6-12 years at best....IS that really worth it?

having a family and being a practicing doctor are not mutally exclusive...hard,yes, but so i would imagine it is hard fro any working parent...why would you decide to train in something so long, go into debt for so much (would you even be able to pay off your loarns in 6 years?) to work only for such a short time?

[Golding]

Personally, I haven't had any doubts until recently, after two years of schooling. It's not to the point of crying, but just a nagging "Do you really want to do this?" sensation every now and then.

Being a doctor isn't a homogeneous thing. Depending on what you want to do, you might not really have to do the distance of 7+ years (the way I look at it, 4 years is school, and the remaining years are the transition from school into work, since you're actually getting paid). Not every kind of doctor spends their life at the hospital and only hears about their family. You're not pipelining yourself into something you don't want to do. You're giving yourself a chance to choose exactly what it is you do want to do.

I do have a family friend that became a doctor, practiced internal medicine for a while, and is currently stopped to raise her kid. It's doable, if that's really something you really want to do.

You can tough it out. Doubts are normal, but just bear in mind why you're doing all this in the first place.

[TerrifyingTidbit]

PrebB18,

think about one thing: you are going to save lives. It does involve a lot of sacrifice and heartbreak, and it's not an easy thing to do. But keep your eye on the ball and you should do OK. Just don't let the Machine chew you up and spit you out; keep your soul and your vision and remind yourself every day why you are doing this.

[rokshana]

you might not really have to do the distance of 7+ years .

sorry, i don't see how you can get around the at least 7 years...4 years med school and a minimum of 3 years residency is necessary to be able to become licensed in the US to practice medicine (if the OP is from a different country, then of course that is differenc, but i made the assumption that she wants to practice in either the US or Canada)

of course if you are looking to get an MD and then not practice medicine (say you want to do research or admin) then of course you would only need to do the 4 years of med school...

[CANeh]

Ah Medicine. The things we give up for it. Lets see ... we give up life. Its worth it if you enjoy what you doing and if deep inside that is what you want to do. If not you going to be one miserable dog.

Going to Grenada (and for some of us to the UK and Grenada) is a great experience. Part of me misses it.. a little bit. I hope no one read that.

[Vanillaroma]

upper termers: did any of you have second thoughts before heading down to grenada?

i've always been interested in medicine and felt that it just made sense for me to be a dr. however, now that med school is literally 1 month away, i'm having major doubts. i was literally sitting in the kitchen tonight and started hysterically crying! the idea of studying SO vigorously and giving up quite a lot for the next 7 (at least) years is starting to take a toll.

i enjoy medicine and therefore always thought that med school was the sensible thing to do. however, i've always planned on being a dr and then stopping to raise a family. now i'm doubting whether or not i'm ready to make such a huge commitment. is it silly to go through so much in order to only practice for a limited amount of time? and did any of you have MAJOR doubts before starting med school?

Its very natural to have second thoughts during such a life changing experience. Hell, I am even having second thoughts as I am typing this. The feelings will come and go, you just have to remind yourself why you are here and that will help you push on. Besides once you are down here, you will meet 400 people who are in the same boat. Nothing helps better than the support of those around you. Good luck!:)

[WarmingUp]

Two things:

1. Doubts, as many have posted here already, are certainly normal for most of us. I would be worried about anyone who is NOT having doubts and worries before undertaking such a gargantuan task. I would certainly think that someon who is not worried is a) not fully aware of what this journey entails, or b) not taking this seriously enough, and either of these scenarios are necessary and sufficient ingredients for some form of disaster.

Personally, I had moments of outright panic - not only am I signing up for astronomical debt, a future full of uncertainties and additional hurdles (residency, etc.), but I pulled my 2 children and husband into this with me. My husband had the type of job (rare in this economy) where they offered him more money to stay, and refused to accept his resignation for a whole week (totally in denial), even though he gave them 2+ months notice. We gave our home to the bank because we could not compete in the rental market (and could not realistically maintain a rental while living on Grenada) and could not sell it in time, plus its value had fallen so far that we would have come out with debt even if we had been able to sell it. And this is just the bigger stuff, so yes, there were many sleepless nights for me...

2. I am a little concerned about your future career projections (as Rokshana has mentioned before me). Your timeline is a bit fuzzy and it seems that your work/life balance ideas are not well-researched.

Oops... I am out of time.... but the second point is really something you should ponder some more (and I'll try to come back and join the discussion later).

[Golding]

sorry, i don't see how you can get around the at least 7 years...4 years med school and a minimum of 3 years residency is necessary to be able to become licensed in the US to practice medicine (if the OP is from a different country, then of course that is differenc, but i made the assumption that she wants to practice in either the US or Canada)

of course if you are looking to get an MD and then not practice medicine (say you want to do research or admin) then of course you would only need to do the 4 years of med school...Fair enough point. You're right. I guess I just have a hard time calling it school when I'm paid for doing it.

[rokshana]

Fair enough point. You're right. I guess I just have a hard time calling it school when I'm paid for doing it.

trust me you are not paid that much...:)

[Golding]

trust me you are not paid that much...:)I'm sure it beats the negative income I'm currently at.

[shadyhtown]

trust me you are not paid that much...:)

Tell that to the more than half of Americans who make less than that, including the fast-increasing population that currently make nothing at all. If nothing else, residents have job security.

[rokshana]

Tell that to the more than half of Americans who make less than that, including the fast-increasing population that currently make nothing at all. If nothing else, residents have job security.

you're not new here...the smiley emoticon didn't tip you off to the j/k, sarcasm???

sorry, job security is NOT a reason a person should go into medicine....you REALLY want the person taking care of you mother of daughter or wife to be in it for the job security??!!!?? (note, no smiley icon...)

[Dr_Killpatient]

you're not new here...the smiley emoticon didn't tip you off to the j/k, sarcasm???

sorry, job security is NOT a reason a person should go into medicine....you REALLY want the person taking care of you mother of daughter or wife to be in it for the job security??!!!?? (note, no smiley icon...)

I believe job security is a large part of anyone considering becoming a doctor--although it should not be the sole reason. I guarantee you that Banks who have loaned you money will not care if you chose medicine for the "right reasons", only that you can make your payments on time (which you can only do if you have job security). The two goals of job security and the "right reasons" are not mutually exclusive. Indeed, I like to believe I'm in it for the "right reasons" as well as for job security.

[Golding]

you're not new here...the smiley emoticon didn't tip you off to the j/k, sarcasm???

sorry, job security is NOT a reason a person should go into medicine....you REALLY want the person taking care of you mother of daughter or wife to be in it for the job security??!!!?? (note, no smiley icon...)With the way things are going in the US right now, job security may actually be a pretty good selling point. :]

[invincibledoc13]

How are we even debating this point ! Your love for the field is the 1 and only reason to get into medicine....

[shadyhtown]

you're not new here...the smiley emoticon didn't tip you off to the j/k, sarcasm???

sorry, job security is NOT a reason a person should go into medicine....you REALLY want the person taking care of you mother of daughter or wife to be in it for the job security??!!!?? (note, no smiley icon...)

Actually got the sarcasm in that particular post, but I've also been on here long enough to know how many people (not necessarily you) diss residency pay/hours, and somehow consider it to be 'low' work.

Oh, and I'd rather a person be in it for the job security than for the money (only being half-sarcastic here - wish they had a half-smiley).

[Golding]

Actually got the sarcasm in that particular post, but I've also been on here long enough to know how many people (not necessarily you) diss residency pay/hours, and somehow consider it to be 'low' work.

Oh, and I'd rather a person be in it for the job security than for the money (only being half-sarcastic here - wish they had a half-smiley).How about this:

:J

[clive]

How are we even debating this point ! Your love for the field is the 1 and only reason to get into medicine....

If that is your ONLY reason then by logic you MUST also agree that you would practice medicine for $5,000 per year.

[invincibledoc13]

If that is your ONLY reason then by logic you MUST also agree that you would practice medicine for $5,000 per year.

That's a bit over exaggerated...

[GLOBALMED]

naive.....wait till RJ lays the smackdown

[Wh0Kares]

I presonaly think whoever is claiming that job security and the pay had zero or even a little influence on their medical career is either in denial or a big fat liar :D

[rokshana]

I presonaly think whoever is claiming that job security and the pay had zero or even a little influence on their medical career is either in denial or a big fat liar :D


umm...that would be me....and i don't lie and am as far as i know pretty much in touch with who i am and what i want...

if money was a big (or even major) consideration then i would be a radiology resident or anesthesia resident or a surg subspecialty resident...they will all do about the same number of years of residency as i will with my combined years of residency and fellowship in IM and (hopefully) endocrine...

...and i HAD job security in my previous life as an college professor trust its pretty hard to lose a job as a college prof....), but is not what i wanted to really do..

there is enough crap that you have to do and take as a physican (and sure alot of that ends with residency) but if you don't have an inherent love (or just excitement) for the field of medicine, you will find that the compensation you get will not be worth it...

i once had an attending (chief of surgery @ EVMS) who said that the ideal is that what you do for a living should be something you would do for free...that the money you get should be a bonus...this is a guy who has been a surgeon (he was reported to be a roommate of Creighton @ HMS and the inspiration for peter benton on ER) for over 25 yrs and still has this ability to inspire you to be better everytime you hear him talk...sometimes i forget this, but i would rather be doing what i am doing than any other job out there...whether i got paid 50,000 or 500,000 (and as an endocrinolgist...sure as shootin, 500k is not in the cards for me...:))

unfortunately many people end up doing a job that is a job,,,they come in, do their work, and then go home...its not who they are ...but for others what they do does in some way define who they are...artists, dancers, teachers, musicians, ministers, policeman, firefighters....what they DO is an inherent part of who they ARE....physicians fall in the latter catagory, not the former...or at least they should be...

[GLOBALMED]

Nice Rok...reminds me of the saying if you love what you do you will never work a day in your life

...but personally I don't buy it, for me at least things get old or maybe I get senile

[rokshana]

Nice Rok...reminds me of the saying if you love what you do you will never work a day in your life

...but personally I don't buy it, for me at least things get old or maybe I get senile


aren't you the one that wants to do things like doctors w/o borders? where would the money be in THAT? (since there will always be people fighting against each other, i guess there is job security....)

[GLOBALMED]

That is some thing that I could do for a month in the year and perhaps once I retire...but I don't really want to be a matyr for medicine and sacrifice my personal life:(

[WarmingUp]

I presonaly think whoever is claiming that job security and the pay had zero or even a little influence on their medical career is either in denial or a big fat liar :D

Age has a lot to do with it... if you are in your early or mid twenties... you don't know what options are out there and you think that medicine is the safest bet - what's there not to like? You have a good job, you get paid pretty well, you have job security, you have respect, plus your mom gets to say: "My son/daughter is a doctor!"

When you are a little older (especially once you have kids), and you have been out in the real world for more than a temp job or a research assistant gig intended for beefing up your EC list, you realize that there are plenty of things you can do to make money. Medicine is not among the easiest paths to money and job security - trust me! Medicine is not even a good or very sensible path to money and job security when you are past thirty and have kids.

So I will have to respectfully ask you to revise your wording and refrain from calling any of us "liars" or "in denial".

For some of us, medicine is the ONE thing we cannot shake, cannot stop thinking about, cannot walk away from, no matter how hard we try... money or the lack thereof has minuscule, if any, bearing on this pursuit.

[Wh0Kares]

Age has a lot to do with it... if you are in your early or mid twenties... you don't know what options are out there and you think that medicine is the safest bet - what's there not to like? You have a good job, you get paid pretty well, you have job security, you have respect, plus your mom gets to say: "My son/daughter is a doctor!"



its quite the opposite actually...when we are young we can afford to test other areas of life and take risks such as business ect ect ..it is when you are in your 30s that you need to pick a path that is safe and *almost* guaranteed....and if you have what it takes, i dont think any profession pays as much as medicine WHILE having one of the highest job securities out there...no one said medicine is the easiest way to make money...but it definitely is one of the safest ways to do it
i never said love for medicine is not a factor...of course it is...its a huge factor but is NOT the only factor...and im not going to retract from my statement simply because its my opinion and im entitled to it..i believe almost no one would have pursued medicine if it was a field that didn't pay the bills and didn't put enough food on the table for your kid...you think thats an extreme example? check out the huge struggling population of america...so excuse me while im not having any of the "money or the lack of it has no bearing on the pursuit"

and Rokshana, i highly doubt you would have ditched your professor job for medicine if it paid as much as a full time Macdonald's employee gets [correct me if im wrong]...why? because you have a family to maintain and a kid to feed (i think?)
....its pretty convinient for all of us to boast how we'r in it for the loveeeeeee that we have for it..because we all know no matter what specialty we get we're still making more money than 90% of americans (90% of americans make less than 100,000 in a year

[WarmingUp]

its quite the opposite actually...when we are young we can afford to test other areas of life and take risks such as business ect ect ..it is when you are in your 30s that you need to pick a path that is safe and *almost* guaranteed....and if you have what it takes, i dont think any profession pays as much as medicine WHILE having one of the highest job securities out there...no one said medicine is the easiest way to make money...but it definitely is one of the safest ways to do it
i never said love for medicine is not a factor...of course it is...its a huge factor but is NOT the only factor...and im not going to retract from my statement simply because its my opinion and im entitled to it..i believe almost no one would have pursued medicine if it was a field that didn't pay the bills and didn't put enough food on the table for your kid...you think thats an extreme example? check out the huge struggling population of america...so excuse me while im not having any of the "money or the lack of it has no bearing on the pursuit"

and Rokshana, i highly doubt you would have ditched your professor job for medicine if it paid as much as a full time Macdonald's employee gets [correct me if im wrong]...why? because you have a family to maintain and a kid to feed (i think?)
....its pretty convinient for all of us to boast how we'r in it for the loveeeeeee that we have for it..because we all know no matter what specialty we get we're still making more money than 90% of americans (90% of americans make less than 100,000 in a year

You are certainly entitled to your opinion... and yet you must make allowances not only for the opinions of others, but also for their experiences, convictions and motivations.

And, for the record, yes, I would pick medicine even if it paid as much as flipping burgers. I doubt the jaded cynic in many (perhaps including you, WhoKares) would believe that, which concerns me not one iota, but I hope the rational human in most would allow for deviation from their own personal worldview and refrain from further generalizations (of which most of us have probably been guilty at one point or another).

[Golding]

I have no doubts there are people who are entirely motivated by the fact that they love medicine. I do think that among some of the people that simply SAY that, though, are people who are being dishonest about their motivation.

People are sort of shy about saying out loud that the money that a professional job offers is part of the allure, because everyone knows that it's an unheard of faux pas for the classic interview question "Why do you want to be a doctor?" That sort of atmosphere conditioned us to believe that anyone who is interested in money cannot possibly make a good doctor. While that might be true, I'm sure there are many people who romanticize the job that also can't hack it.

rokshana, if your motivation is for the love of the work, that's fine and comprehendible. My only hope is that you turn out to be a good doctor, and that you're prepared to see the ugliest in people as well as the good when you help them.

Wh0Kares' broad statement was just retaliatory about Invisibledoc13's broad statement. Some of us are a little jumpy to try to catch others on an idealistic lie, because we've seen people do it (and have probably done it) during the interview process.

[rokshana]

rokshana, if your motivation is for the love of the work, that's fine and comprehendible. My only hope is that you turn out to be a good doctor, and that you're prepared to see the ugliest in people as well as the good when you help them.

trust me there are many a days that i wonder if this is all worth it....sometimes i think i shoulda stuck with teahing...at this point i would have been tenured...and whokares...i would have been workin far less for 6 figures as a prof by now...

and believe me, i am at a public hospital and a VA to boot...i definitely see the ugly...and there are times when i get frustrated with the social issues (who knew all the social issues!!!!) and the paperworkand the paperwork and did i mention the social issues???

[invincibledoc13]

Without getting into any personally targeted debate, I would like to point out that what I meant was that a person who loves the profession should GET INTO it. Now, what makes you sustain ? Money ? Job Security ? Or love for medicine ? That would vary from person to person. Influenced by parameters such as age perhaps. I know of people who are glad they are in this profession (outside of the US) and haven't been fired without notice (aka global recession). Thus, job security with steady pay. Haven't seen too many who are in it for the former. Then again, there aren't too many plastic surgeons driving Bentleys around where I come from !