Crossroad and Depression.. Need Help!
Hey all, (this is long so I apologize in advance)
As some of y'all know I have posted my abysmal scores a few times on here to gauge my chances at medical school. I'm currently at this major fork in the road in my life. I graduated back in December with my BA in History. Since then I have had no had in luck in finding employment so I've been living at home. I've determined that an MA is history will not help me with what I want to achieve in life. I've been discussing with my parents about going back to Tech and getting a second bachelor's degree. Right now I've been discussing Engineering with them because I love science and it's kind of applied science. It's a good practical degree with many job opportunities, however I cannot get excited about it... and I suck at calculus lol. My dilemma is that I frequently visit this site and read all of these forums and I get sad. I miss my premed days! I cannot hear the words "medical student," or "physician," or even "anatomical terminology" without getting depressed. I don't know what to do, and I definitely know that my parents are getting sick of me always going back to "I want to be a doctor." I'm really depressed tonight, like borderline tearing up because I feel like the dream of becoming a doctor is pretty much dead or at least on life support. I know people say if you want it bad enough you'll find a way to make it happen, but I just don't think that will happen. My AMCAS gpa is a 2.7 and my sci gpa is a 2.5, AACOMAS gpa is a 2.85 and my sci gpa is a 3.05, no MCAT yet, not to mention the 12 w's. I also have not finished the pre reqs. How the heck am I supposed to persuade an adcom to take a chance on me when there are so many qualified applicants? I've thought about finishing my pre reqs this year and taking my MCAT next summer, but I don't even know if it's worth the money if I going to be in the exact same position that I'm in now. I've also considered doing an SMP after the MCAT, but I do not have that kind of money to spend... I feel like the dream is dead and it is tearing me up on this inside. Screwing around in undergrad is the worst decision that I've ever made in my life . Has anyone suffered through this type of torment? Sorry for the lengthy rant, but I have no one left to turn to other than the good folks on ValueMD. I want to be a doctor so freaking bad! I'm the son of an RN and the grandson of a physician, medicine is all that I'm interested in, literally there are no other fields out there that peak my interest like medicine... I don't what to do... I need a time machine... I have to make a choice to either to go back to school or abandon medicine forever.
Last edited by RedRaider_01; 04-26-2011 at 06:50 AM.
"He's dead Jim" - Dr. Leonard McCoy