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Originally Posted by stephew
didnt she at one point say decide that her steps of denial acceptance etc were wrong when she was ill? Or is that not true? Ive heard it several times.
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Author changed way many deal with death
http://www.azcentral.com/arizonarepu...s-death26.html
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Kathy Shayna Shocket and Connie Cone Sexton
The Arizona Republic
Aug. 26, 2004 12:00 AM
She lived as an international icon, a tireless champion for the terminally ill who changed the way people thought about death and dying.
She died as a frail 78-year-old who welcomed death, content that her mission was complete.
The final chapter in the life of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross began last Thursday in a Scottsdale care center as she sipped juice and ate a piece of her favored Swiss chocolate. To help manage her breakthrough pain, she was given an increased dose of morphine. Swallowing pain pills had become difficult. Later that night, she slipped into unconsciousness, never to wake again.
She died at 8:10 p.m. Tuesday, surrounded by family and friends.
It was the kind of peaceful and dignified death she wished for herself and the world.
It was the final stage, acceptance, that Kubler-Ross outlined in her 1969 book On Death and Dying, which became a pop-culture phenomenon. She theorized that the dying go through five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Many scholars praised her for recognizing the emotions that the terminally ill endure. But other academics charged that the grief stages were too rigid. Kubler-Ross, however, stressed the stages were never meant to be a formula. Some people may even experience two stages at the same time, she said.
Kubler-Ross, who had been ill for several years after suffering from a series of strokes and infections, died of natural causes.
Feisty, charismatic and empathetic, the Swiss-born psychiatrist took hold of the subject of death in the 1960s and never let go. She rallied for doctors and nurses to treat the dying with dignity, addressing their questions, fears and anxieties but also their pain.
"She got people talking about death and dying and took it out of the closet," said Susan Levine, executive director of Hospice of the Valley in Phoenix.
"It was the last taboo after sex and money, the things you don't talk about in polite company. I'm sorry the world will be without her. Personas like hers don't come along every decade."
On Death and Dying, the first of about 20 books she would write, was grounded in the lives of the 500 terminally ill patients whom Kubler-Ross interviewed. She invited several to speak to medical and divinity students she taught at the University of Chicago.
Although many doctors recoiled at her frankness about death, she became an icon not only to those working in the field of death and dying but also to the terminally ill and their loved ones. She urged doctors not to let their patients die in pain. Millions of her books have been sold and translated into several languages. In 1999, Time magazine named her as one of the "100 Most Important Thinkers" of the past century.
Kubler-Ross was a rebel from a young age, ignoring her father's wishes to become a secretary. She became a country doctor in Switzerland, instead. In 1958, she married an American doctor, and they moved to the United States, where she eventually landed at the University of Chicago and developed a following for her seminars on death and dying.
But the university failed to see the scientific merit of On Death and Dying, and Kubler-Ross was denied tenure. So she hit the lecture circuit to give "Life, Death and Transition" workshops, increasing her public profile. She delved into research and wrote more books.
Near the end of the 1970s, she became interested in mysticism and spirituality. Her quest, in which she got help from "spiritual guides," repelled some of her admirers. She came to wonder if death existed at all or if the dying pass into another world.
She sparked more controversy in 1980 when she bought a farm in Virginia to create a healing center where she planned to care for AIDS babies. The center burned to the ground in 1994. She suspected her work had angered the community.
She moved to Scottsdale in 1995 at the urging of her son, Ken Ross, who lives there.
Although strokes weakened her body, they did not affect her mind and speech, said her son, a travel photographer.
On Sunday, a hospice nurse told Kubler-Ross' family that her heart was weak and that she might die within hours. When her daughter, Barbara Rothweiler, called from Wisconsin to say she would be there the next day, someone put the phone up to Elisabeth's ear, and within an hour, her heartbeat got stronger and steadier.
Kubler-Ross didn't want extreme measures, like a feeding tube, to stay alive.
Before she died, she was asked how she would know when her last breath was near. "She said, "I'll know. Every part of me from my head to my toes will know that its time to go,' " said Brookes Cowan, a hospice volunteer who flew in from Vermont to help manage her friend's pain.
Kubler-Ross added that she was "going to dance across the galaxies."
During her final hour, her son and daughter were at her side. Her grandchildren, who had been sitting across from her bed watching cartoon videos, were taken outside when it appeared death was imminent.
"Elisabeth was all about death and dying in character, and her death epitomized that. The act-of-dying phase lasted about an hour. The room was full of life and chaos," Cowan said. "That's how people used to die, surrounded by children and adults, and it's accepted as a natural part of the life experience."
Condolences have been coming from around the world. The Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson, called Ross on Wednesday to say she was sorry to hear about his mother's condition and offered her assistance. Ferguson visited with Kubler-Ross after Princess Diana died.
Visitation will be held from noon to 3 p.m. Sept. 4 at Scottsdale Bible Church, 7601 E. Shea Blvd. Her memorial service will follow at 3 p.m., also at the church. Those planning to attend are asked to send an e-mail to
elisabethkublerross@yahoo.com. More information is available at
www.elisabethkublerross.com .
Kubler-Ross, who moved to Scottsdale in 1995, had been living in an assisted-living complex for the past two years.
Ross said his mother had been in the acceptance stage of facing death for about 10 years.
Others saw her as bitter or angry. Not because she was going to die, but because after all the work she did to help others die with autonomy and independence, she was facing a lingering death and was herself dependent.
Her son recalled that after she suffered a bad fall and infection and nearly died about two years ago, she said she was ready to go. She recovered.
"She told us that she was like a plane that had left the gate and not taken off," Ross said